Amazon reviews as poetry

NS Pritchard left this poetic review for the timeless Casio F91-W:

Cars break down, phones malfunction, computers get infected but the F 91 soldiers on. Cheap and ubiquitous. Everybody seems to have owned one. Its “beep beep” woke thousands this morning. It measured and guided their days all long. It has a stopwatch, a light, an alarm: This is what I need and all I need from a digital watch. In moderate climes the battery will last for seven years (based on an alarm and one seconds’ worth of light use per day). I wish my life was so efficient and so certain. I wish I was so dependable.